Loved that first book”it’s got no equal”

but, Johnny, we don’t love your sequel.

If you would only take a chance

on self-help or a gay romance,

we’d let you keep your last advance.

Phony conspiracies would do

if you could find a hook or two”

like someone famous who won’t sue.

Marketing knows you’ll see the light,

and thinks Da Vinci is just right.