Wednesday, February 24, 2010, 7:00 PM
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First Things
The novel of the century. Specifically, the nineteenth century.
All the misinformation in the known universe, now in one handy volume.
Table of Contents.
Dr. Boli's Curious Friends.
Dr. Boli's Publishing Empire.
February 24th, 2010 | 7:09 pm | #1
I’m running out of grocers! At first it was only the specific Giant Eagles where I had beaten the stockboy senseless that refused me entry, but now my image hangs above the customer service counter of every location with a note advising the baggers to use “Any means necessary to effect removal.”
February 24th, 2010 | 9:51 pm | #2
This is sheer genius. Next up: Homeopathic gasoline. I can run my car for trillions of years with just a few drops of gas!
February 24th, 2010 | 10:20 pm | #3
Dr. Boli is not an expert on homeopathy, but (if he understands his advertisers’ claims correctly), the principle is that what causes a symptom in large doses will cure it in infinitesimal doses. Gasoline makes a car go, but brakes make it stop. To create a powerful homeopathic fuel for an automobile, then, Dr. Boli would imagine that an extremely attenuated dilution of brake dust would be most suitable.
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