In most of the United States of America, tonight is the night when we stop pretending that it is an hour later than it is when we are merely pretending that noon happens at exactly the same time across a wide and jagged vertical stripe drawn down the face of the continent.

In Arizona, tonight is one of two nights a year when patriotic citizens who have avoided the communist conspiracy of Daylight Saving Time feel smugly superior to the pinkos in the rest of the country.