Terrell Clemmons writes in the latest issue of Salvo magazine about the impact abortions have on men involved in the situation, a relatively undiscussed (perhaps even socially taboo?) subtopic that is also somewhat neglected by the scientific literature. Opening with the Ernest Hemingway story “Hills Like White Elephants,” an early literary attempt to grapple with lingering, diffuse emotions over the procedure, he goes on to cite a pioneering sociologist’s work on the issue:
Arthur Shostak, Ph.D., a professor of sociology at Drexel University, was an early voice insisting that abortion is not just a women’s issue. After his own personal involvement in an abortion, he placed questionnaires in the waiting rooms of abortion clinics, surveyed a thousand of the respondents, and published the results in Men and Abortion: Losses, Lessons, and Loves (1985).
Two major themes stood out. The first was “the deep involvement of the men.” Eighty-four percent felt that they had been a full partner in resolving the pregnancy, but few were at peace with the resolution. The second was the men’s anxiety and high level of personal distress. “An overwhelming proportion of them had thoughts about the fetus, had dreamed about the child that would not be and anticipated misgivings after the abortion,” Shostak found. “Ninety-eight percent said that if they could help it, they would never, ever find themselves in this situation again.”Shostak himself, although he voices no objection to abortion on moral grounds, felt likewise. “While I believe my lover and I chose the least-worst of the options available to us over two decades ago, I have lingering regrets about the situation.”
Fortunately, as Clemmons proceeds to note, there has been more recent work on the subject, including a 2010 study which adds further weight to the contention that abortion is not, as some seek to portray it, a choice-in-a-vacuum that only impacts (if it does that at all) the individual agent making the decision. Rather, it is a “loss [which] reverberates and magnifies over time,” drawing in a veritable network of others.
Read the rest of Clemmons’ article here.
August 1st, 2012 | 3:26 pm
So what is to be done? If we accept the findings of those who claim that women (and now men) suffer serious consequences when they choose abortion, suppose yet more informed consent laws are passed and everyone seeking an abortion is inundated with information and warnings. Would this lower the abortion rate? I rather doubt it. I think people need to be given concrete alternatives. Or is the point of this information that abortion should be banned to prevent people from freely making choices they might regret later—that is, to protect people from themselves?
August 1st, 2012 | 5:01 pm
[...] Read Matthew Cantirino’s thoughts on the article over on the blog of First Things here. [...]
August 1st, 2012 | 5:39 pm
A group here in NYC holds monthly, peaceful prayer vigils in front of one of the Planned Parenthood facilities. Afterwards we have a re-cap with the sidewalk counselors about what happened that particular morning, and to my surprise, for the past few months the people most willing to talk to the counselors have been men– the fathers of the children. Seeing grown men break down in tears in front of the facility is not only heartbreaking but a sure sign of the larger impact you mention above.
August 1st, 2012 | 9:44 pm
Would this lower the abortion rate?
Maybe we could lower the abortion rate if we’d start recognizing the reality of the grief (and stop playing along with the people who want to minimize and deny the parts they don’t like).
When people come into contact with abortion, it hurts them. It hurts the women who get abortions, and it hurts the men whose children are aborted, and it hurts the grandparents, aunts and uncles when they know or suspect, and it hurts the people who perform the procedure.
Abortion can only flourish in a culture where people are so dead or broken inside that they can’t acknowledge or experience any new pain. Living, healthy people cannot be comfortable with killing humanity’s future.
The correct response to unwanted babies is (a) to stop making babies that one does not want and (b) to find a real solution to caring for the ones that are created. You do not “cure” a social problem by killing all the people who are associated with that problem.
August 1st, 2012 | 9:55 pm
Harlan Ellison’s powerful short story Croatoan was written to exorcize his guilt after a woman aborted his child…it is about our throw away culture, but also about the possibility of redemption.
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