Person One: The U.S. Constitution , the text as a poster board visible but all torn and battered up, and some kind of Obama-branded SHREDDER as a prop.

Person Two: The U.S. Economy —here all that’s needed is lots of fake bruises, bleeding, chains, crumpled bills, slow-sickly movements, fake vomit, etc.

Person Three: Hope and Change —a little trickier, because here you have to find the FATTEST person you know to agree to wear a too-small old and ratty Obama T-Shirt (maybe pillows will do). Top it off with a post-office-like hat with the letters “U.S. Federal Government” on it, and have the person drink a lot.

Person Four: U.S. Deficits . Very tall stilts are the key, along with a prominent display of the Obama deficits chart. So long as the person can keep their balance while continually showering fake money on all the party-goers, they’ll do.

Person Five: Obama’s Teleprompter . Difficult to pull off this grandiose a costume, because you need to find the most handsome male or female around, dress them in the most audaciously royal clothes you can afford, have them constantly followed by four or five persons praising them and genuflecting, put some sort of teleprompter-like display on their chest, have some kind of portable device playing audio of Obama speech highlights, and then tie to their back, so that they kind of drag it behind them in all their pomp, an empty folding chair.

Any ideas I’m missing?

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