In the old days, men at the top of some cultures would father scores of children from his many wives and harem concubines. I thought of the harem nursery when I read the story of one sperm donor fathering siring more than 150 children. From the NYT story:
Cynthia Daily and her partner used a sperm donor to conceive a baby seven years ago, and they hoped that one day their son would get to know some of his half siblings — an extended family of sorts for modern times. So Ms. Daily searched a Web-based registry for other children fathered by the same donor and helped to create an online group to track them. Over the years, she watched the number of children in her son’s group grow.
And grow. Today there are 150 children, all conceived with sperm from one donor, in this group of half siblings, and more are on the way. “It’s wild when we see them all together — they all look alike,” said Ms. Daily, 48, a social worker in the Washington area who sometimes vacations with other families in her son’s group. Cynthia Daily and her partner used a sperm donor to conceive a baby seven years ago, and they hoped that one day their son would get to know some of his half siblings — an extended family of sorts for modern times.
My generation created a sense of procreative entitlement that I don’t think is culturally healthy. Rather than get married and then having kids–a two parent home being best for children–some now decide that their deepest yearning trumps restraint, and they do whatever it takes–ranging from the technologically unsophisticated at-home artificial insemination to renting wombs and genetically altering embryos for eugenic perfection–to achieve their heart’s desire. People can argue over the propriety of that, and while I think it would be a good thing for people to realize they can’t have everything in life and adopt in cases where they aren’t married and want children, the horse is out of the barn on the cultural trend. Still, stories like this show that the Reproduction Industry desperately needs some regulations if we are to maintain at least a modicum of order and decorum.
Unlike the children in The King and I who knew their father (embedded above), children brought into being through reproductive technology sometimes express deep yearnings to know their anonymous biological fathers. The Center for Bioethics and Culture, for which I am a compensated consultant, will soon release a documentary on that too insufficiently discussed issue. Here’s the trailer for the soon to be released Anonymous Father’s Day:
September 6th, 2011 | 10:55 am
Unfortunately people today genuinely believe that children are “resilient”, and that concerns about “deep yearnings” – or “identity” or “truth” or “living a lie” or any of the other stuff that is so important for grownups, just isn’t very important for the kids.
After all, kids are things you “have” – as in “own”. They’re more like pets than people.
And that is justified by pointing out that there are lots of starving kids, abused kids, kids without homes in the world. As long as there are some kids who would love to have any home at all, then whatever you do to your kid can’t possibly be that bad, right?
September 6th, 2011 | 11:32 am
[...] First Things Blog Second Hand Smoke: Your 24/7 Seminar on Bioethics and the Importance of Being Human The Sperm Donor’s Harem Tuesday, September 6, 2011 Wesley J. Smith My generation created a sense of procreative entitlement that I don’t think is culturally healthy. Rather than get married and then having kids–a two parent home being best for children–some now decide that their deepest yearning trumps restraint, and they do whatever it takes–ranging from the technologically unsophisticated at-home artificial insemination to renting wombs and genetically altering embryos for eugenic perfection–to achieve their heart’s desire. People can argue over the propriety of that, and while I think it would be a good thing for people to realize they can’t have everything in life and adopt in cases where they aren’t married and want children, the horse is out of the barn on the cultural trend. Still, stories like this show that the Reproduction Industry desperately needs some regulations if we are to maintain at least a modicum of order and decorum. Share on Facebook Share on Twitter More Sharing Options Print This Post [...]
September 6th, 2011 | 1:47 pm
A little over a year ago I learned that I had a half sister conceived by sperm donation…my late father’s sperm donation. Having grown up in a tight knit, large Catholic family, this came as quite a shock. Fortunately, my half sister has become a huge blessing to a majority of the family. However, most of her life was spent in a state of suspended animation, wondering and seeking the other half of her identity. Reproductive technology is rapidly producing people whose deepest needs are simply disregarded because someone “wanted a baby”. Thank you for this article. It resounds with truth…a truth that begs to be heard.
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