“I’ll tell them some of the hard truths we don’t always like to teach, but sometimes must. That life is not fair, and it turns on a dime. That the world is not a safe place and it never has been, and that’s why when we are looking out for each other, we are doing the best we can to keep ourselves safe, as well.”
Okay, maybe not the wisdom of the ages, but for heaven’s sake…it’s so much better than the trembling lip and the waving hankie.
– Anchoress, 10-03-06
The Virginia Tech massacre has delivered unto us piles of bodies, one genuine and tragic hero, (we may learn of more) too many immediate critics and poseurs, and the usual media orgy that begins with a stupid, self-indulgent question and will continue until every possible position and technique has been tried.
We will watch the whole pageant play out – a parade of interviews with stunned students, the grieving parents, the hapless school officials, the “grief” counselors” the speeches, the “hurry up and heal, hurry up and forgive” advice, the first funerals, the hurried legislation to ban firearms (as though the world could somehow ever be made safe) the memorial plantings and tribute walls, the talking heads who know only what they know, which is never much, and who spew it endlessly, endlessly, in an effort to promote their fervent opinions on to the rest of us. There will be “investigations.” There will be finger pointing. There will be lawsuits. Sound and fury signifying very little beyond what we have always known of the world: it is a rough and dangerous place where horrible things happen, and when they do – when these catastrophic horrors conceived in man’s own hearts occur – we have little to cling to beyond each other, and that in which we have chosen to believe.
Eventually we’ll stop clinging to each other and move back into our lives. Most of us will hold even faster to our beliefs, be they natural, supernatural, political or cynical. We’ll dig in, and the disobedient world – as mysterious and unknowable as the human heart – will continue to resist taming, will simply get that much more mysterious, and that much more difficult to navigate.
The simple truth is that despite what the world via your television is saying to you right now…there is no solution to the problem of human unpredictability. There is no “fixing” this so that it never happens again; it will. Auschwitz happened. Stalinist Slaughter happened. The Killing Fields happened. Sarajevo happened. Somalia happened. Columbine happened. 9/11 happened. The murder of Amish School children happened. This has happened. Something else will happen in the future, and everyone will be shocked and horrified and say “who is to blame, where may we direct our helplessness into productive or self-rightelous rage, and what’s my cut of the lawsuit?”
Last night I noted that my son and his friends were paying only passing attention to the story. It’s not that they’re unfeeling, but they know that they needn’t remain glued to the television – a press that can find thousands of ways to discuss Anna Nicole Smith can do a slaughter of this magnitude on their heads, and they will. But as I remained parked on my convalescent couch last night I talked to Buster and his friends about how seamlessly they were able to move from watching the distressing images from Virginia to clicking on a re-run of Scrubs. “There is nothing I can do for those people,” one young man said. “I can feel bad for them because they’re in a world of hurt, and if I were there, I’d have done something, or if I were a cop, an EMT worker or something, I could do something. But I can’t. All I can do is sit here and feel bad for them, which I do, but I can’t wallow in it. That would be like making porn of it.”
“Yeah,” another one said, “the truth is, these people, it’s horrible, but all you can do is kiss them up to God and then hope when it’s you turn to face something horrible, you can deal with it.”
When it’s your turn to face something horrible…
These kids are all about 17 years of age, and they’ve already figured out that we all get our dose of horror, that no one escapes life unscathed.
I thought about that for a long time while I watched 5 young men process unthinkable information and images in precisely the way society has more or less trained them to process it – by clicking the well-named “remote” to another channel, and thinking of something else.
It sounds unfeeling, doesn’t it? For hundreds of parents, thousands of family members, the world has just stopped spinning aright, and they will never be whole again…but for a generation, the story has only a little more emotional impact on their lives than your basic television drama, and since it plays on an endless loop, they know they can click to a ballgame, a sitcom, a wrestling match, and then click back at any time, to watch the story in progress.
The temptation is to judge them as cold and uncaring – don’t they know that a world has ended for many people, don’t they understand that evil is alive and all around?
Why yes, they do. They do know it, but thanks to “nightly news” broadcasts that have trained them to segue from one story (a tragedy) to another (a surfing parrot) without consideration for appropriateness, and thanks to a modern parenting style that over-emphasizes feeling “good” and attempts the banishment of feeling “bad”…they seemed to have moved beyond “appropriate” responsiveness into a strange pragmaticism that says, “life is dangerous, and eventually I’ll get mine, but if I can’t do something about this particular problem, I don’t have to think about it right now. Right now, I’d rather laugh and feel good.”
I talked to Buster about it later that evening. I asked him what he thought of it all – the shootings, the instinct to move from that story to a sitcom rerun. He said, “Mom, I’ve run the Columbine scenario a million times in my head. I’ve thought about what I would do, depending on where in the building such an attack were to take place. I’ve sat in class thinking about how the windows open, what structures would make the best barricades and how to go about taking the bastard down rather than simply cowering in fear while people are shot to death. I’ve thought of it. We’ve all thought of it, my friends and I, we’ve devoted hours to thinking about it. If you think we’re being cold or cavalier, I think we’re simply aware of the fact that this is what the world is, that no one can ever guarantee our safety – not schools, not governments – nothing is going to absolutely and 100% protect us from what is out there, what can come into our lives in an instant, and change everything. All we can hope is that when stuff like this comes our way, we can do the courageous thing.”
Then again, Buster always was a pragmatist.
Perhaps the secret that has spilled forth from Virginia Tech is that a bucolic illusion of created, assured safety has been burst. In an era where captured British soldiers take home goodie bags and have their irresolution applauded, we can only look at Professor Liviu Librescu’s determined heroism as an awesome aberration – he did the courageous thing.
Professor Librescu came from a different generation – part of “the greatest generation” which has been both honored and reviled by the de-constructionist know-it-alls they raised. I don’t know if his generational sensibilities had anything to do with his willingness to lay down his life so that his students might escape with their own. But after observing and talking to the young men of my acquaintance last night, I tend to think that the generation coming up behind us may surprise us and reject the goody bag. I think they’ll consider playing dead if they think it might fool a predator, but if action is required I believe they will act. They’ll do whatever it takes to get through a thing so they can pick up the remote and move on as quickly as possible, because wallowing feels to them too self-serving, too much like porn.
NOTE: I know this is not much of a post, messy and disjointed, sorry, but I really don’t know what to make of the world, myself, and am still functioning at half-steam. I am on the mend after a surprisingly tough exacerbation which had me laid very low, indeed. Please bear with me as I am nowhere near ready to get back to work full-time. I thank you most heartfully for all of the prayers (is there anything more humbling that to note – as the president did today, when addressing a stricken student body – that “people you don’t even know are praying for you”…I am humbled, indeed, and more grateful than I can say) and for the much-too-kind notes that have come my way. I will try to respond to all of them, if I can, in the coming days…weeks…I’ll be taking it slow. Thank you so much and God bless you. God bless us, every one, especially those who are in grief today.
April 17th, 2007 | 4:46 pm | #1
Even when you aren’t running at full steam and with one hand tied behind your back, you still hit ‘em outta the park.
You are right to note- and emphasize- that there are some problems we cannot fix.
Those are the times we need to look for God, so that we might find comfort in the truth that we while we can manage our own lives, we cannot manage those events that are
There is a difference between managing our lives, as we are supposed to do, and attempting to influence or explain away those mysteries that are in the purview of God.
Those things cannot be appropriated by us.
‘Our salvation, help and even inner peace, those things so ethereal and undefinable, are within the purview of God. They are what we cannot see- and those are things we need to pray for.’
April 17th, 2007 | 4:56 pm | #2
The very good news is that as more reporting goes on, we know there were more than one heroes involved in this, and the new ones we are finding are of the younger generation. I feel sure had your young Buster been in a position to be a hero he would have done so.
Have you read this? http://thunderrun.blogspot.com/
It is a wonderful story, not of students, but of a great teacher.
Hope you are better and up and commenting on the good things to come, very soon.
April 17th, 2007 | 6:05 pm | #3
Anchoress,
Glad to see you are, at least, feeling somewhat better.
God Bless.
April 17th, 2007 | 6:56 pm | #4
Hmm, sounds like these guys have learned the serenity prayer. “God grant me to the serenity to accedpt what I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”. I give kudos to them, because apparently, in this, they have the wisdom.
April 17th, 2007 | 7:16 pm | #5
Chivalry. It’s in their bones (if we don’t bully it out of them with feminist rhetoric) and it’s what a healthy society counts on for its well-being. The Bridegroom is called to lay down his life for the Bride, and the practice runs (mental or actual) happen more often than we imagine. Deo gracias!
http://feminine-genius.typepad.com/femininegenius/2007/04/running_the_sce.html
April 17th, 2007 | 7:34 pm | #6
[...] something new every day… VT April 17th, 2007 As usual, the Anchoress writes an amazingly insightful post about the Virginia Tech tragedy. It’s long, but well worth [...]
April 17th, 2007 | 7:46 pm | #7
Thank goodness you are well enough to post today. I have been all over the internet, read it all. It was only when I came here that I found what I was looking for, what I was feeling. Only you say it so much better than I can even think it. Thank you for your commen sense and thoughtful commentary. Feel better!
April 17th, 2007 | 10:07 pm | #8
I can tell you that your son has it correct. Run through the “what if” scenarios so that if something ever happens you are mentally prepared. You can’t dwell on what might happen, just be mentally prepared; obviously not totally prepared, since nothing ever seems to go as imagined. But if you keep your thoughts agile, you can react quickly. As a field startup engineer for over 30 years I have found that when operating power plants and systems for the first time, they can be dangerous and try to surprise you with failures you hoped would not occur. So you take precautions that you just know will never be needed, until they are.
Take care and be safe.
April 17th, 2007 | 10:12 pm | #9
I finally got myself registered because I wanted to send you my caring thoughts as we hear you are not feeling well.
Then, today, I find your post about Buster, the boys and Virginia Tech. With a just turned 18 year old son at home who, this very night, was seemingly as unfeeling as your Buster – but not really. He just sees no point in wallowing in it; hearing about this story over and over again as, admittedly, I have been wont to do. Our boys are right: it is rubbernecking and it is a waste of our energy.
To my original purpose my dear: I find you a wonderful read, such good humor and a lovely caring heart. Take care and thank you for being there.
April 17th, 2007 | 10:25 pm | #10
I’ve thought about what I would do, depending on where in the building such an attack were to take place. I’ve sat in class thinking about how the windows open, what structures would make the best barricades and how to go about taking the bastard down rather than simply cowering in fear while people are shot to death. . . . All we can hope is that when stuff like this comes our way, we can do the courageous thing.
.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for saying what no one else has yet said, but has been needed to be said. They need to raise a few monuments and rename a couple of buildings for Professor Librescu.
April 18th, 2007 | 12:44 am | #11
My eleven year old daughter was very upset about the massacre at Virginia Tech. That night as she got into bed we talked about the very thing you mentioned at the beginning of your post. None of us is guaranteed a tomorrow. None of us knows when our time here will be up. Evil is real and can wreak havoc anywhere. The reason I bring this up is that our conversation turned to Jesus, eternal life, and heaven. As we prayed for those who were killed and for their families, the full realization of what happens to those who ignore or put off the decision to follow Christ dawned on her. They may never have another chance. That is heavy stuff for a preteen girl to ponder, but it is something we all need to remember.
April 18th, 2007 | 4:56 am | #12
“[...] all you can do is kiss them up to God [...]”
Well, that pretty much says it all. When you remove God from everyday life, something must fill the void. And if it is Evil …
Good post, Anchoress. No rambling or disjointedness to these eyes. Keep healing!
April 18th, 2007 | 5:41 am | #13
Dear Anchoress,
I am glad to see that you are at least strong enough to post a bit again.
…”all you can do is kiss them up to God and then hope when it’s you turn to face something horrible, you can deal with it.”
I was deeply moved the way this young man this. It is profound and so very true. Tell him thank you!
I agree that Prof. Lebrescu needs to be honored for his courage and valor. I have been strengthened by him because I know that I know that there are deep untapped and profound wells within each person. Prof. Lebrescu just proved that one more time!!! What a contrast to the tragic event that just happend – but what a reminder of the love and integrity, courage and strength that the human spirit possesses!!!
April 18th, 2007 | 6:58 am | #14
I was but a year younger than Buster and his friends when I got inducted into the club of trying to come to grips with the evil in the world. The date was Nov. 22, 1963, and has been something I have never been able to forget since.
‘
So much violence in our country in just 43+ years. We have almost become immune to it, and yet we still grieve over those who have left us too soon.
April 18th, 2007 | 8:32 am | #15
God rest ALL their souls. I am praying for all the dead – although I’m finding it difficult to refrain from praying that the soul of the shooter burns in hell. You are much more of a good Christian than I am at times, dear Anchoress, which is why I (we all) cherish you so completely.
Feel better. Prayers are still coming your way in a mighty thunder.
April 18th, 2007 | 9:21 am | #16
[...] Cultural Pessimism, Idiots. trackback I was waiting for the Anchoress’ read on this. She does not disappoint: The simple truth is that despite what the world via your television is saying to you right [...]
April 18th, 2007 | 10:23 am | #17
Sounds like you’ve raised some good young men, and some of your neighbors have too.
April 19th, 2007 | 11:39 am | #18
[...] From her first post: But as I remained parked on my convalescent couch last night I talked to Buster and his friends about how seamlessly they were able to move from watching the distressing images from Virginia to clicking on a re-run of Scrubs. “There is nothing I can do for those people,” one young man said. “I can feel bad for them because they’re in a world of hurt, and if I were there, I’d have done something, or if I were a cop, an EMT worker or something, I could do something. But I can’t. All I can do is sit here and feel bad for them, which I do, but I can’t wallow in it. That would be like making porn of it.” “Yeah,” another one said, “the truth is, these people, it’s horrible, but all you can do is kiss them up to God and then hope when it’s you turn to face something horrible, you can deal with it.” [...]
April 19th, 2007 | 12:29 pm | #19
Talk about perspective!…
Just got done reading this over at The Anchoress. This post won’t make it into some high-brow, we-know-more-than-you-do newspaper, you may not hear it read on a talking-head show. But, to be quite honest with you, it should be.
I must admit I don’…
April 20th, 2007 | 12:52 pm | #20
[...] 20th, 2007 by clevergael And I think about his safety all the time. So when I came across this post from The Anchoress, it occurred to me that although I don’t normally discuss these things with [...]
April 22nd, 2007 | 4:35 pm | #21
Anchoress,
Love your writing! FYI, I quoted you in a post here:
http://emperoraf.livejournal.com/207232.html
As far as I know, Livejournal does not allow trackbacks.
I’m praying for you!
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