Support First Things by turning your adblocker off or by making a  donation. Thanks!

Why is Satan not too hot in hell?
He doesn’t seem to suffer like the rest
Who languish there. You’d almost say he’s blessed,
He’s acclimated to the place so well.

Perhaps he has a fast metabolism?
But he can’t be impervious to heat-
That would be kind of silly and defeat
The purpose of this weather-changing schism.

No, there’s a different way he disobeys-
An air-conditioned office where he stays,
A well-stocked mini-fridge that would entice
God himself-cold beer and, oh, the ice!
To his chagrin, he cannot let God know.
From time to time, he mops his brow for show.