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Because I lack the competence (unlike Pete) to do a serious commentary on the current crisis or crises, I thought I’d address the big issue of the (token conservative) replacement for George Will on ABC. Here are nine possible candidates.

It goes without saying that if you want a multifaceted and somewhat unpredictable young guy on the rise, you’d go with Ross Douthat over the other folks on the list.

On another screen, I endorsed Yuval Levin (not on the list), especially if he can get taller. I’m also okay with Chuck Norris (who is on the list), but I assume he doesn’t need the work.

I’m not for David Brooks—not because I don’t like David Brooks, but because he doesn’t really represent reliably the conservative view and because he gets lots of screen face time already. Ross plus David B. would be great, of course.

The argument for Ross and Yuval is, of course, they have the mixture of “public philosophy,” laidback but serious theology, instinctive and calculated prudence, and expertise in public policy that our side needs to look smarter than it often does and be smarter than it often is. Plus they both have that kind of nerdy charisma that might grow on America. I wouldn’t want any of the more shrill or shamelessly self-promoting names on the list.

And don’t forget Pete, whom I assume is circulating a seductive YouTube audition to the right people right now.

But what do I know? I very rarely watch ABC news shows for any reason.

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