Someone emailed me a week or so ago and wondered where “the old Anchoress” was, the one who would (his words) “batter some deserving snook so soundly one was tempted to look away and ask for police tape to respect the body.”

Hmmm…I’ve been wondering about that myself, lately. I just don’t seem to have the old snark-a-roo. Seems when I went on retreat, I left it there?

See what happens? You ask God to help train your tongue to moderation, and to give you a more loving heart, and even when He does it a little bit, you say, “but…can’t I still be bitchy, sometimes, too?”

Unfortunately, I’m still much bitchier than I want to be – just ask my family. But snark does seem to have diminished a bit, too. I trust that is a good thing. Right?

On the plus side, though, there is always Snark and Boobs (no, we’re not related) and tonight she is a very snarky read, indeed, as she muses on David Letterman’s launching himself into Mark-Sanford-Land. I only pray he doesn’t start crying. There is no crying in baseball, politics or Late Night TV:

Dear David Letterman:

Please, stop talking. Now. You are even creepier than Sanford. At least he’s merely pathetic and sad. You are just dirty old man creepy.

Plus, while Governor Sanford is an Emo chick with a chattering problem, he has actually accomplished some things in the recent past. You, on the other hand, haven’t even been funny since 1989.

I simply picture Sanford listening to REM “Everybody Hurts” over and over on a loop whilst scrawling frantically in his tear-stained diary. Letterman? I hear a creepy “Hee-HEE” in my head and picture things best left unsaid. If only I could leave them unseen by my mind’s eye as well. It may call for copious amounts of alcohol.

Snark & Boobs finds an old interview with one of Letterman’s girlfriend’s and it’s…sort of stunning in a creepy-makes-you-shudder sort of way. Or, it made me shudder, anyway.

More amusing stuff – Iowahawk says “None dare call it art…” an ambitious art contest for which some lucky winner will receive a grant from the Iowahawk Endowment for the Arts, in the princely sum of $33.18. This is in direct response to the probably-illegal-&-if-Bushies-had-tried-it-there-would-be-screaming-and-calls-for-investigation-and-impeachment-but-since-the-Obamies-did-it-the-press-ignored-it-with-a-troubled-parental-frown attempt by the White House to use the NEA for political gain. Iowahawk said “send me aggrandizing propaganda, and I will pay you,” and send, they did – to the tune of 89 Entries. I like several of them quite a lot, but my absolute favorite is #5, The Hipster POTUS, which is just so very well done:

I also like the “Meniscus Tear” (#16) but that’s only because I nurse one, myself. And #43. And #70. There are some surprisingly good bits over bad art and bad verse over there!

Now, Iowahawk included these voting instructions:

Voting will be conducted under a combination of ACORN and Art world rules: Vote for as many entrants as you want, as often as you want. Feel free to be capricious. Shameless promotion, logrolling, and backroom deals are strictly encouraged. I’m pretty sure the voting software can be tampered with on my end, and all reasonable bribes will be considered. This unique system will provide our amateur contestants a taste of the professional art world, and a convenient face-saving excuse for the bitter soul-crushing rejection they are about to receive from the public.

I did try to vote multiple times, however and was not able to, so obviously, his voting machine is rigged, or someone is keeping the payola for himself.

I file this under American Genius.

UPDATE I: This is pathetic: CNN runs to protect Obama from SNL’s mild snark of last Saturday. They’re complaining because -while SNL portrayals of Sarah Palin and George W. Bush were “spot on” this skit about Obama is “not” spot on, and they’re being mean to Obama! And one of the “experts” is worried that this is how people get their news! That didn’t worry them for the past 8 years, but now it’s official: Snark is mean! Snark might confuse people! Snark might weaken the presidency.

It scares them because they understand just how effective mockery was in destroying both Palin and Bush.

The worst part of the whole report -and there are so many bad parts, it was difficult to choose- is when they announce that the White House had “no comment” on the SNL sketch. This “brilliant” White House hasn’t the capacity to laugh at itself, and hasn’t the wit to simply give a little snark back, as in, “you know, the whole thing would have been so much funnier, if the SNL impersonator had you know, tried to actually impersonate the president.”

That’s all it would take, and the story would go away. Good heavens, if the Obama White House can’t take a joke, they’re doomed!

Remember what Chesterton said: “Satan fell by the force of gravity…Angels fly because they take themselves lightly.”

Check out Bush at 4:50 and the press reaction:

And one more, because it’s fun to watch a man who knows who he is and is comfortable in his own skin:

UPDATE II: From my Li’l Bro Thom:

Oh. My. God. Have Klein and his people at CNN completely lost their MINDS? You would swear that was something off of The Onion. You know as well as I do that I tend to lean leftward but…holy smokes! That’s just so…awful.

Yahoo ran a fact-check on the skit too. Can you believe it? The press is treating Obama like a little girl who needs all of their protection. And since both CNN and Yahoo have done this, I’m guessing someone at the WH wanted it done. Humorless, like I said. And stupid.