Because of my participation on this blog, which bears the name conservative (albeit postmodern), I have evidently not yet made it on the list of potential appointees to the Obama team. This is much to be regretted, not for any reasons of personal ambition, which I abjure completely, but because in the cause of postpartisanship (if not postmodernism) I believe a participant from the Culture 11 group (may it rest in peace) would add immeasurably to the depth of the dialogue going on within the administration, mixing it up with the likes of Susan Rice and Samantha Power (reminding them there was a free election in Iraq on Saturday), or with Lawrence Summers (recalling to him, since he failed so conspicuously in stimulating the women at Harvard, how one might do better with the economy).
Yet though I have been passed over thus far, I do not despair. For I have a plan to bring my name to the president’s attention as a potential high-level nominee. I have overridden my paid accountant (Turbo-Tax) and instructed the program that I will not be paying my taxes this year and will continue to refuse until I receive a position in the administration commensurate with my talents. I will remain true to the new cause, declaring loudly and unashamedly: “Thousands for myself but not one cent for the government.”
Call me a hold out, naive, forgetful, or whatever you like, but as far as I can see this course of action is the best way to qualify for a position in the changed world of Washington. It is much better, for example, than paying one’s taxes, which is only for the poor and bitter types who aspire to be no more than assistant secretaries than real power holders. And it is evidently better than old-style corruption, which forced Bill Richardson to retire. Of course, I know I might have to face the mild rebukes of some in the Senate, who, like Chris Dodd, are paragons of ethical probity, and the likes of the New York Times may even oppose me (largely to shore up its own lack of credibility). But I know that if I have a letter of apology ready to go, admitting to feeling embarrassed, the position will eventually be mine. And I know, Mr. President, that you will support and welcome me to the team, “absolutely”
While I have you, can I ask you something? I’ll be quick.
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